Silent Period

Picture of a businessman meditatingJust occasionally in the course of our work, we at
Leasing Life come across a turn of phrase in among the
usually straightforward lexicon of banking that tickles
the imagination with a suggestion of the surreal.

Which is why when one reporter was
scouring the web pages of the major leasing networks in search of
important dates in the financial reporting calendar – a purely
recreational activity – he was intrigued by one of the mysterious
events listed.

The reporter found that the
financial calendar of one bank-owned lessor informed him he had
entered, and would remain for the next six weeks within, the Silent
Period.

Slightly perplexed, he looked
across the office, quickly flicked to 24-hour rolling news
channels, gave a glance at the sky – had he missed something?

A second bank was adhering to the
same tradition and the calendar of a third major financial house
confirmed his suspicions; we had missed something and had been
conversing quite loudly in an apparently universally recognised (at
least within European leasing) Silent Period.

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By GlobalData

Yes, I suppose it’s common
knowledge that January is a quiet period between third-quarter
interim reports and full-year results for the majority of financial
businesses, but to have explained this at that point would have
ruined the fun.

Instead, better to leave him to
wonder what might happen during this mysterious period.

Why was knowledge of this time of
secrecy squirrelled away in some cobwebbed crevice of the financial
report calendar?

Who else knew about it?

Familiar with the leadership of
European leasing and his unwavering devotion to a well-priced
equipment lease, our reporter realised there could be only one
answer to this wordless riddle.

High in the mountains of Europe,
atop the Alps, the Apennines, the Carpathian and the Scandinavian
ranges, leasing professionals had gone into self-enforced
isolation.

In monasteries, cabins or in caves,
chief executives, chief operating officers and financial directors
were sitting and meditating on how best to preserve their margins
in 2012.

Clad in hessian, kneeling on
hassocks and living on a strict diet of bread and water, the
leaders of our industry surely sat in contemplative silence in
order to estimate KPIs for the year ahead. Of course.

Far-fetched? Perhaps. But did it
make for a more entertaining idea of what a Quiet Period actually
entails? Definitely.

 

Twitter logoTweets of the month

#paddingthemagazine

A selection of the wisdom shared by
those who follow @leasinglife, replete with dry
replies of under 140 characters.

 

@EnnismoreP

19 January

A simple dashboard like on your car
is the most effective way to monitor your performance

Only if your job is to run
around really quickly with the radio on, not running out of fuel
and counting the miles as you go.

 

@MrPRman

24 January

I’m going to the Hampshire Chamber
of Commerce ‘Speed Networking’ event. Who else is going??

What’d be the point of going if
someone told you the attendees’ names and companies? That’s all
you’d have time to find out anyway.

 

@Zerocredit_UK

22 January

Looking forward to taking on the
first of two new social media staff tomorrow :-0

Please get them to stop you
tweeting Ascii emoticons. Semi-colon, capital D.

 

@ShawbrookBank

23 January

Good news Londoners, wi-fi access
on tube platforms across 120 stations will be available for the
2012 Games

Because what we need while the
tube is at maximum capacity are people fixated on their phones and
laptops right beside a decelerating train.

 

@glennonrj

13 January

Must stop forgetting to swap
accounts. Can’t have the Corporate account following Middlesex
Tiddlywinks Association or Naturist Firewalkers!

Reminds us of the time we
nearly went to press with “My Cat’s Shoebox Antics Up 4%” as a news
lead.

 

@TRACKER_UK

19 January

The most valuable November TRACKER
stolen vehicle recovery was a £80,000 Lamborghini Gallardo

Cheers, we’ll pick it up at the
weekend.

 

@ZeroOneCArs

9 January

Full Moon Last night, Out here in
“the sticks” with no light pollution … was awesome. I would have
taken a picture… but you know……

We missed it in London, we’re
all underground staring at cats-in-shoebox stories on our iPads,
while our Lambo is delivered. :-/