Leasing Life’s monthly diary page, filled with the latest
gossip and insight on the less visible aspects of the asset finance
industry.
Managing to keep busy
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Life has come to know leasing as an industry often prone to
reticence and privacy regarding its inner workings, it would seem
that nowhere do the currents of mystery run deeper than in the
broker sector.
An open offer to publish news from
brokerland only made it as far as the fortress-like reception desk
of Capex Finance, before our reporter was told that no one was in
fact there, and that in any case Capex “didn’t take this kind of
call”.
Evidently, the epidemic of asset finance
journalists calling to offer free publicity has now reached crisis
levels at Capex, and as such Leasing Life will graciously
step back from the scrum and allow their labours to continue in
secret.
A Christmas of
leasing
In an entrepreneurial move that would have
Ebeneezer Scrooge rubbing his grimy hands in delight, one company
in Somerset has found a way to spread the unique joys of leasing
into the formerly innocent world of Christmas decorations.
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By GlobalDataThe Festive Lighting Company, formed in
2000 by director Vivien White, now offers three-year hire purchase
arrangements for the acquisition of large-scale Christmas
decorations by public and private bodies alike.
Following the trend of service-inclusive
deals started by the motor sector, the merry contracts include
transport to the display site, repairs, and storage throughout the
less festive months of the year.
Lack of relief
Leasing could be one of the solutions to
provide relief for people in need.
Liverpool’s council has been condemned by
a Commons select committee for failing to use its powers, including
its “leasing powers”, to provide sufficient numbers of public
loos.
The committee has criticised the city of
Liverpool for providing only one council-run toilet.
A report, called the Provision of
Public Toilets, has stressed that cities should use their
existing planning, licensing and leasing powers “at their full
potential”.
Amazing financial
planning
The mighty Irish military has come under
fire this month after what can only be described as two massive
leasing blunders.
Not a few Irish folk were up in arms over
the €2.5 million lease of two helicopters for passenger use which
turned out to be, er, unlicensed to carry any passengers. Reacting
to the useless 10-month contract, which is now the subject of an
inquiry, Department of Defence secretary general Michael Howard
said: “Sometimes with something like this, you learn by doing
it.”
Indeed.
In a separate ‘chopper’ fiasco, Rotor
Leasing Ltd, an American company, sold four Air Corps helicopters
to the Chilean Navy for €18.7 million that it had previously
acquired from the Irish forces for €360,000.
Admittedly, Rotor Leasing did indeed
re-fit the helicopters, but still this did not stop the fightin’
Irish demanding answers from their generals.
Sláinte
A Dutch joke
Dutch brilliant sense of humour seemingly
has no ends. One senior staffer, with a reputation for being a
cheeky chappy, at a Netherlands leasing company, chose recently to
use his jokey prowess on a representative from Panasonic.
The customer was initially a little taken
aback at the financier’s supposed friendly manner, which included
several fake boxing manoeuvres and air punches.
However, the stuffing was knocked out of
him when the lessor kneed him in the private parts. Apparently he
had aimed to knee kick the air, but tripped and fell forward. How
funny.
Symbols, food and
finance
Many words were spent by one Leasing
Life writer last month in attempting to understand the
character of German leasing.
If, however, it is true that a picture
paints a thousand words, a lot of effort could have been saved by
taking the approach of ING Lease’s annual report and representing
German leasing as an artichoke. Or a sprout. Or a pile of pumpkin
seeds.
In truth, however, Leasing Life
isn’t quite sure what to make of the small green graphic below, but
we know it pales in comparison with the stately potato offered to
Poland, or the Czech Republic’s elegant mushroom.
Quote of
the Month
After a photographer was unavailable to
capture one particularly well-received presentation at the
Leasing Life conference in Brussels, the speaker kindly
struck an oratorical pose for a photo opportunity after the
event.
In his enthusiasm to recapture the moment
of his speech visually, he perhaps did not realise the microphone
was still on, leaving us with this haunting (yet bizarre) call to
arms:
“We need change, and we need it
rapidly and consequently, otherwise we will be in deep s***. And
change is coming – Mr Gorbachev, tear down this wall!”
