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  1. Analysis
January 26, 2012

Basement Talk

Just occasionally in the course of our work, we at Leasing Life come across a turn of phrase in among the usually straightforward lexicon of banking that ticklesthe imagination with a suggestion of the surreal. Which is why when one reporter was scouring the web pages of the major leasing networks in search of important dates in the financial reporting calendar a purely recreational activity he was intrigued by one of the mysterious events listed. The reporter found that the financial calendar of one bank-owned lessor informed him he had entered, and would remain for the next six weeks within, the Silent Period.

By Grant Collinson

Silent Period

Picture of a businessman meditatingJust occasionally in the course of our work, we at Leasing Life come across a turn of phrase in among the usually straightforward lexicon of banking that tickles the imagination with a suggestion of the surreal.

Which is why when one reporter was scouring the web pages of the major leasing networks in search of important dates in the financial reporting calendar – a purely recreational activity – he was intrigued by one of the mysterious events listed.

The reporter found that the financial calendar of one bank-owned lessor informed him he had entered, and would remain for the next six weeks within, the Silent Period.

Slightly perplexed, he looked across the office, quickly flicked to 24-hour rolling news channels, gave a glance at the sky – had he missed something?

A second bank was adhering to the same tradition and the calendar of a third major financial house confirmed his suspicions; we had missed something and had been conversing quite loudly in an apparently universally recognised (at least within European leasing) Silent Period.

Yes, I suppose it’s common knowledge that January is a quiet period between third-quarter interim reports and full-year results for the majority of financial businesses, but to have explained this at that point would have ruined the fun.

Instead, better to leave him to wonder what might happen during this mysterious period.

Why was knowledge of this time of secrecy squirrelled away in some cobwebbed crevice of the financial report calendar?

Who else knew about it?

Familiar with the leadership of European leasing and his unwavering devotion to a well-priced equipment lease, our reporter realised there could be only one answer to this wordless riddle.

High in the mountains of Europe, atop the Alps, the Apennines, the Carpathian and the Scandinavian ranges, leasing professionals had gone into self-enforced isolation.

In monasteries, cabins or in caves, chief executives, chief operating officers and financial directors were sitting and meditating on how best to preserve their margins in 2012.

Clad in hessian, kneeling on hassocks and living on a strict diet of bread and water, the leaders of our industry surely sat in contemplative silence in order to estimate KPIs for the year ahead. Of course.

Far-fetched? Perhaps. But did it make for a more entertaining idea of what a Quiet Period actually entails? Definitely.

 

Twitter logoTweets of the month

#paddingthemagazine

A selection of the wisdom shared by those who follow @leasinglife, replete with dry replies of under 140 characters.

 

@EnnismoreP

19 January

A simple dashboard like on your car is the most effective way to monitor your performance

Only if your job is to run around really quickly with the radio on, not running out of fuel and counting the miles as you go.

 

@MrPRman

24 January

I’m going to the Hampshire Chamber of Commerce ‘Speed Networking’ event. Who else is going??

What’d be the point of going if someone told you the attendees’ names and companies? That’s all you’d have time to find out anyway.

 

@Zerocredit_UK

22 January

Looking forward to taking on the first of two new social media staff tomorrow :-0

Please get them to stop you tweeting Ascii emoticons. Semi-colon, capital D.

 

@ShawbrookBank

23 January

Good news Londoners, wi-fi access on tube platforms across 120 stations will be available for the 2012 Games

Because what we need while the tube is at maximum capacity are people fixated on their phones and laptops right beside a decelerating train.

 

@glennonrj

13 January

Must stop forgetting to swap accounts. Can’t have the Corporate account following Middlesex Tiddlywinks Association or Naturist Firewalkers!

Reminds us of the time we nearly went to press with “My Cat’s Shoebox Antics Up 4%” as a news lead.

 

@TRACKER_UK

19 January

The most valuable November TRACKER stolen vehicle recovery was a £80,000 Lamborghini Gallardo

Cheers, we’ll pick it up at the weekend.

 

@ZeroOneCArs

9 January

Full Moon Last night, Out here in “the sticks” with no light pollution … was awesome. I would have taken a picture… but you know……

We missed it in London, we’re all underground staring at cats-in-shoebox stories on our iPads, while our Lambo is delivered. :-/

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